So much f*cking stress...

My god... The stress.... Today I leave for my dad's.... Meaning two weeks until I get any Internet... My phone's being shut off any time today or tomorrow because we can't afford it... We're to the point where we can barely afford gas to go to the grocery store, let alone buy actual groceries. I'm so sick of my cheery facade... It's tearing me ip even more to have to pretend everything's fine. I just... Feel so lost... So... Gone. The numbness that tends to take me has pulled me under... I get beyond caring at times. And when I'm dazed and zoned out, I hate when people do that bogus waving of the hand in my face. Maybe I don't want to be in this f*cking reality right now! Quit bringing me back. And I HATE the constant, "Are you okay?" do I f*cking look okay? No! Kthanksbye. Focus in school is impossible. I spend my classes reading, writing, or writing notes to my boyfriend who's long distance... :( AND of course I won't be able to talk to him until I buy my new phone. I am desperately job-hunting... Though it's not going well at all... Effffff.

Then there's mom... Same as always with her alcoholic/mega-druggie tendencies... I'm so glad I don't live with her anymore. That was too much to handle. But that's a whole other story...

Anyway, needless to say, writing is my escape... And reading. I'm still waiting on a pretty banner/layout for A Faerie Tale whose seventh chapter I've produced this weekend. Check it out. :)

If anyone stuck around to read my rant, thanks. Hah! It was quite... Bleh. Bleh. Bleh. I just need to vent every once in a while... :/