Some critique

Some critique on my story Letters. would be really awesome :) I feel like I'm doing a crappy job and I just want someone to let me have it and tell me all the things that are wrong or how bad it is or something along those lines.
I'm not one of those people who is going to ask for critique and then get mad at what you say. I promise :) Be harsh! Be real! Be mean! Okay not mean, but you get the idea.
Oh, and please? :)

Also, if there is a story you have that you would like me to read I will gladly do so and comment :)