Not Me.

I'd like to thnk that getting older hasn't changed me. That it hadn't changed who I am or who i really think I'd like to be. Nothing, even in my social circle has ever been about just me. I find myself being ' uninvolved' with my own life. I was contempt, caring in my bubble of focus on everyone elses life instead of mine. Maybe that's also why at my age I can't tell anybody " who I am " in any sense. I can't even say my names Sarah because it feels like I'm lying.

This new year I started taking on tones of projects. Lots of extra shifts and the grocery store I work at, with an arts festival coming up in may, prom commitee and a volenteer for drug semenars everyother week I feel like I'm living in another persons body. And I'm hating every second of it.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel so tucked up inside. It like I don't want myself to be happy I really hate it. I hate myself for the idea. But all I can tell myself is.... It's not me.

But what is Me? I'm not sure if this is a retorical question anymore. I think it needs a new answer.