Writing Update

I realize that I haven't updated anything in over a month, and that's because I'm going through kind of a...writing identity crisis, I guess. I keep wavering back and forth over whether or not to move on from Mibba, and it's taking a toll on my writing. I used to be so grateful for Mibba because knowing that people were reading my stories would drive me to get updates out every week, and that led to a semi-regular writing schedule that I really liked. Then, a couple of months ago, I got really discouraged. I started to resent writing in general because I was putting all these hours into it and barely getting any feedback in return. I decided I would leave completely because I found another writing site, Figment, where I was getting better feedback than I ever got here. So, I deleted all my stories with the intention of never coming back.

Figment turned out to be no better than Mibba in terms of quality and quantity of feedback. I got a few amazing comments, but it soon degenerated into the appreciated, but totally unhelpful sort of feedback that people get so frustrated with here. I decided to put my stories back up on here for those who wanted to read them. I decided that I would put up some new one-shots, a new A7X fic, and finish The Benjamin Tapes. And now I've kind of lost my way again.

I love The Benjamin Tapes and To The Death. I've had both ideas in my head for almost a year now and I've been working on The Benjamin Tapes for nearly as long, and while I absolutely adore all of the characters, I know the plot needs some work. With The Benjamin Tapes, I've realized that if I want to be completely happy with it, I need to do some more research on police proceedings and whatnot and come up with a more plausible reason for the ghost town. Because right now I feel like it just sounds phony. I'm itching to take it down and edit it and finish it and not put it back up until it's absolutely perfect, but I do not want to go through the trouble of posting it again, mostly because the format of posting things on here is a pain. I'm leaving it up for now, but I'm taking a step away and focusing on other things, so don't expect any updates. Maybe I'll finish it, maybe I won't. I'm not making any promises.

I will, however, probably continue with To The Death. But updates will be super slow. I don't want to abandon another story, but I need some time to figure things out.

I was thinking about posting some new stories as well, but I have an idea that I'm crazy about that I might want to publish someday, so that's taking up most of my focus.

I'm definitely going to finish re-posting Bite Your Tongue, so don't worry about that. As for This Nightmare Land...I have a feeling that it's going to end up being part of this new idea I have, and I doubt that I'll put it up again. =/

I still don't know what to do about Mibba. Half of me just wants to delete my account and move on and write completely for myself without worrying about disappointing people by not updating, and the other half is so incredibly attached to this place that's been like a second home for three years that the idea of leaving makes me sick, even though I rarely talk to anyone and am basically just a ghost on here.

I don't know. This was meant to be a lot more coherent and informative and it ended up just being mostly me rambling. Sorry about that.
April 7th, 2011 at 05:16pm