Young love story

Have you ever met someone who just.. kept surprising you with who they are and every time you learn more about them it just makes them all that much better?

Or someone who was your exact opposite for so long and then you two become closer and you realized you two were exactly the same, just he's better than you?

That's how I feel about my boyfriend. At first I was concerned about dating him, because he's perfect. Well, classically perfect. Like, goodie two shoes, perfect gentleman, good Christian boy perfect. Which, I mean, if you didn't know me well you'd think it was perfect for me.

But I'm so different from that. I'm a good kid, don't get me wrong, but I'm much more... different.

I'm for gay rights, I love joking about anything and everything (Nothing is sacred to me, really. If it's funny, it's funny)

I had the biggest crush on Philip Mason Gentry. I even wrote a story on Mibba about my totally unrealistic day dreams about him some day falling in love with me.

Completely unrealistic.

On October 30th I decided to stop playing around with this one guy who was no good for me, my family didn't like him at all. He was in love with me, but he was bad news. He wasn't even in love with me, he was in love with my body.

He was pushy, constantly telling me there was no way Philip would ever like me, he just wasn't right.

He was also Philips best friend, but that's past the point. I did like him, but I imagine it was mostly because of self-esteem problems. I liked being loved. A lot.

My family didn't exactly know I was playing around with this guy (When I say playing around I mean just.. lots of kissing and groping I guess. I'd like to say I was very uncomfortable with it all and usually told him to stop) but they knew something was up. That Sunday I admitted I had messed up to my older sister. She asked me what I was gonna do about it, so I took action.

I told him we had to stop, so he knew it was coming.

Then on November 17th I was talking to Philip on facebook, when my brother came in.

I had been crushing on Philip for a good two years. Totally convinced he'd never have any feelings for me. Everyone except Philip knew I liked him. I mean everyone.

It was a big joke around my family.

Anyway, my brother Timi pressured me into asking about who Philip liked, because we were on the subject.

I was joking around acting amazed that he had ever liked anyone, or for the matter that he liked someone then.

I was all like "Would I be out of line to ask who it is?"

I swear it was the longest minute in my life. Waiting for him to respond was awful. I was giggling and blushing with my twin sister and my older brother. They were so excited, I felt sick.

I kept squealing and saying "This is going to be the worst rejection story ever!"

"Nope. It's you".

My brother and sister ran into my parents room jumping up and down shouting and cheering and telling them what happen. I just sat there shocked.

I told him I liked him back (Because my brother made me) and told him I had to go.

I didn't have to leave for another hour, but I felt sick.

I went into my sisters room, surprised and completely red. I didn't know what to do, really. I mean, about two hours later I realized it wasn't a dream when I was walking to the play ground.

I had a million theories.

He got me confused with someone else, his older brother (Who are both in college) were accidentally on his account on facebook, he knew I liked him and didn't want to reject me, he was pulling an awful joke and I said I liked him back before he could say "Just kidding!".

I didn't believe it until his best friend conformed it.

Then I was convinced he'd leave me as soon as he heard what I did with his best friend.

He tried to kiss me on our first date and I moved my head, embarrassed because it reminded me of my first actual kiss that he didn't know about.

I told him my secrets, he told me his. He believes in me when I don't believe in myself. He misses me when I'm gone, he insists on opening the car door for me, insists on walking on the right side when we're walking on the side walk, he's probably more accepting than I am and more open minded and humble and amazing.

Definitely more amazing, though I'm 100% positive he'd disagree. Rather, he'd come up with some smart remark about it which would make me roll my eyes.

He's honestly better than anything I could have dreamed about.

Tomorrow he's coming over and hanging out with me while I'm sick. We're going to build a fort in the living room and watch little kid movies.

The closest he's gotten to making me cry is right now, when I think about how much I love him.

I love him.

It's such a relief to not have to question that. I'm 15, I know that I'm a kid. I'm a child. I'm so young if I can't consent to have sex legally. I'm so immature and I have no idea who I'll be in 10 years.

All I really know is I want to live and I want to live with him. Forever.

I don't want to kiss anyone else, I don't want to be with anyone else. I don't want to wake up to anyone else when I get older.

I don't want to struggle with anyone else.

For a while I was really worried, because come on, what are the chances of a 15 year old and a 16 year old actually making it?

Then I realized it's our choice.

It's not like someone can tell me I can't grow old with him. It's up to us. If it doesn't work out, I'll be happy because we decided on it. Or he did. I dunno, I suggested that he would break up with me and he said he'd stab himself in the face.

Anyway!

It's up to us.

I love him.

So much as changed, Mibba. So much.