You're only lovely if you're artificially made

I’m so tired of looking through tumblr feed and seeing everyone reblog these artificially lovely girls. It makes me want to run to the bathroom and throw up, so I can be as skinny and “pretty” as them. I don’t want to feel like I have to be size 0, have no butt, and wear certain items of clothing to be beautiful. I want feel confident to say I’m a size 5, and that I have a big butt. That I don’t have the biggest boobs in the world, and that I’m not the tallest. That I wear plenty of make up, dye my hair to a prettier color, and do way too many body modifications. (Piercings, tattoos, ect.) I want to be able to walk through the mall, and not compare myself to the pretty/skinnier girl walking past me, thinking she’s probably thinking, “I’m totally hotter than her.” I don’t want to constantly think that there’s someone judging me in some form. It’s upsetting though, because usually there is. I want this to make sense. And not seem like I’m rambling, but that’s exactly what I’m doing. Oh well, I guess.

I want to be able to look in the mirror and say, “I’m perfect the way I am.”

Sorry for the random rant.

Love,
Ella.