Crys for help

This is not the first time, I am calling out to you for help, I know your have problems of your own and don't need mine but you are the only one I can trust anymore, you are the only one truly there for me no matter what. I cut the word help into my left fore arm with pushpins wishing you could see it but you can't right now. I hope it will be there for you to see in the morning but i have taken a picture just incase i didn't cut deep enough and it heals overnight.
I wore the empty chain today and I am going to until my heart is filled. The chain resembles my heart and righ now it is empty, as soon as someone like you fills my heart with love the tear drop dimond will go on the chain to show you that you have shown your love but I still cry from the broken heart you gave me so long ago </3
I am sitting here in the dark trying to stop myself from cutting anymore, at least for tonight anyway. Am I really that strong? Am I strong enough to finish the job for once, so everyone else can go on with their lives without me as a burden? I may not be yet but soon enough I will finish myself...