Please read this. =[

I thought about this...
I really did.
Would I be happier without him?
Yes, I would...
That was my pathetic answer.
I would give my heart a break
And give his words a break.
Now I'm without him.
And I'm not happier.
Would I take it back?
Would I fight for forgivness?
Is it even worth it?
Questions I don't think I will ever answer.
I'm afraid of myself.
And of him.
I can't be truthful to anyone.
I would admit that I still love him.
And I have.
But is it worth it?
No...
None of it is.
I tried.
I gave him every thing he asked for.
But time was something he couldn't give.
And that's all I asked for.
Love could have been a problem.
I know I had a shortage of it.
I was afraid.
And I was fighting for anything that would get me through without getting hurt.
I hurt myself more then he could ever.
It was kind of like a form of suicide.
His words was the knife.
And my pain was the blood.
Flowing and falling.
Like I always did.
I trusted myself once in awhile.
I asked myself to breathe and let it go.
But I couldn't when It was chokeing me.
I have to admit, I felt a little better when it was over.
But after awhile I missed the pain.
I lived with it so long, it was hard when it was gone.
It was like a death had just happened.
It was just a part of me though...
I stoped before it could take the rest of me.
I have to admit that I am sorry.
I let go of something that wasn't ready.
I still think of the past
And what he did to me.
But It's over now.
But I wish I could ask...
Was it worth it?

=]
=l
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