Lifeless and dull

I've been feeling shitty and reckless for the past few nights now. I wanna do something careless and raise some hell but i can't... for one thing... i don't want to ruin my parents repuation around these parts of the neighborhood and two... there is no one worthwhile to piss off ('rent's don't count).

Lately there;s this one guy that has been on my mind at night. He is off limits to me though... oh what a bummer. Here's why... he's my best friend's ex & he's my brother's best friend. Yeah i made the stupid pact of friendship to not date exes and I swore to myself that i would not look to my brother's friends.

So now i wonder... what is life supposed to be for a girl like me? Am i supposed to be unhappy for all of the teenage rebellion i've been putting up? ugh i have to get over this lump.... what to do, what to do....

Advice needed for anything and everything... thanks.