Is it right ? Help please.. ?

I cheated and I feel so stupid.. I what to die an slit my wrists some more... But my bf keeps reminding me of what I did.. Is that right? He doesn't understand that everytime he says that, that I break inside each time... Is that right? Idk what to do but all I know is that I am beating myself up so badly about myself.. I jut can't handle it but I love him.. You may ask why I cheated and I can honestly say I'm stupid... What to do.. Help please.. I don't know what I can do anymore but lay here lifelessly And cry