Learning Things The Hard Way

Disclaimer: I am sharing this story to enlighten some people who might be in a similar situation. You can think of me as a bad person for putting her on glass like this, and if so, that's on you. Now then, on with my story.

Throughout the years, I've become paranoid, jealous, angry beyond believe, finicky, and at times, straight up, hardcore mean. I could blame this on past relationships, how my mother raised me and instilled fear into me, or my emotions getting the better of me. I prefer to blame all three. All of my friends know this. Or at least I thought they did.

So this one girl that I have a crush on is 15. I'm about to turn 18 and become a freshman in college. Obviously, I don't need to be messing with this girl romantically. I learned this the hard way tonight. She drinks, she smokes, she has a nose ring (not that that means anything anymore), she doesn't seem to care. But I find her absolutely beautiful and very sweet, huggable, kissable, and I love to be around her most of the time.

Now, I thought I made it very clear to her that I can be very up tight. She was the first person I drank with, and we've spent hours together getting to know eachother. But apparently, she likes to play too much. Now, why this wasn't apparent beforehand, I have no idea. Maybe I turned a blind eye to it, or maybe she just didn't let it show.

Now, I hate lying. With a passion. And after a friend of ours had a terrible breakup, she was there with her the next day to help her. That was the day I was wanting to see her to finally tell her how I feel and ask her out, but she ignored my texts. This got me on edge but I finally contacted her and relaxed. After getting wasted and calling another friend of ours an idiot and a blow fish, I was already annoyed at her. Then she decided to message me. Bad idea.

Her: whastr5?
Me:are u drunk?
Her:nooooooooooooooooih
nedvws
ever
Me:don't lie to me
are u high?
Her: jooo
niooo
Me:are u fucked up?
Her: no
isd s0on ouowondt do thst
Me: so you're just so mental you can't even type straight
Her: whxst? yea
shes drunk

This conversation made me loose all respect for her. So tonight I sent her this text:
"Imma be real with you: I was gonna ask you out Monday but you were busy. So i was gonna try again today, but after that conversation when you tried to lie to me about being drunk, it killed all respect I have for you.You wanna drink that's fine but don't lie to me"

Her response was: "Really wow I was drunk and playing around, don't take everything so seriously.And if you would have asked me I would have said yes but now I don't know anymore."

Ladies and gentlemen, if you are about to ask someone out, consider their age in relation to yours. Don't waste you time on some (I hate to use this word but it fits) immature little girl who can't handle herself. Especially if you have enough issues already.