Confessions - Just because I feel like it.

Confession number 1: All I want to do lately is hurt myself.
Number 2: I'm ashamed of my own feelings.
Number 3: No matter how many times I get told I'm skinny, I feel fat.
Number 4: No matter how little I eat, I feel like I'm eating too much.
Number 5: I'm terrified of being alone.
Number 6: I'm constantly paranoid that everyone is watching me, waiting for me to do something wrong.
Number 7: I don't ever tell anyone how I really feel because I feel like I shouldn't feel like I actually feel.
Number 8: I'm terrified of telling him the truth.
Number 9: I'm terrified of losing them both.
Number 10: If I don't have my stuffed panda at night, I have a panic attack.
Number 11: I'll tell a stranger before I'll tell my friends.
Number 12: Silence makes me nervous.
Number 13: She makes me feel like a waste of space.
Number 14: Instead of getting mad at her, I get mad at myself.
Number 15: I feel like I'm not fully connected to the world.
Number 16: I hate having free time.
Number 17: I want help, but, at the same time, I just want to be left alone.
Number 18: I'm scared, sometimes, that other people can hear my thoughts.
Number 19: I want to be able to start completely over.
Number 20: I love him more than I should...