Just one day and it could all change.

no more medicine.
no more misunderstandings.
no more standing alone in the rain for hours, trusting someone will save me.
no more leaning on people.
no more broken heart.
no more bleeding heart.
no more need for open heart surgery.
no more "you can't do this"
no more feeling like the human version of Nemo
no more forced smiles
no more saying "oh, it's nothing."
no more apathy
no more desire for sympathy.
no more absolute necessity for people to like me.
no more struggling to fit in my own family.
no more being a pushover.

just one day could change everything.
that's usually how it happens.
whether it's meeting someone once that changes my life that I will never know on a a personal level no matter how badly I desire to,
if it's being told my lungs work or my heart is going to heal,
if it's someone saying that I'm their hero and not being yanked out of my hands for the rest of my life,
if someone just told me they loved me and could prove it,
if someone complimented me once,
if I finally was the most talented person out of a two or three people,
if I finally was appreciated,
if he apologized,
if those who fled from me with no reason wouldn't lie about them coming back,
if I finally had a good idea,
if I was embraced before I asked for a hug,
if someone noticed me crying,
if someone held me and told me I was going to be okay,
if someone would just say, "I'm proud of you."
I don't care.
I just want to be appreciated.
to be loved unconditionally.
to feel what it's like for things to be mutual.
just one day before I die.

is it really too much to ask?
Am I a bad person?
Do I complain too much?
Am I being punished for the small rules I break?
Or being trained to deal with the outside world, though my parents believe that I've never lived a tough life?

if I could only trade places with someone with a heart that beats.
For just one day.