havent written in awhile... #2

so i havent written in a while. i dont kno what to say. just that i've had thoughts about relapsing. but i didnt. even at this moment of writing this im thinking about relapsing. it's in my head almost 24/7. but i kno it will leave soon. it just has too. so i just woke up from a bad dream. i killed someone after they killed my cousins, and sister. it was kinda fun, but i still have the feeling, as im sitting here awake, that i had when i was sleeping and killed him. lol knida weird i guess, but i dont kno what else to put. oh well. i guess this is it, ttyl bye! <3