oo3. rehab, cocaine, & ronnie.

so, if you read my first journal, you know that i just got out of rehab. i was sent to rehab from the hospital after overdosing on coke. i kind of just want to get out all this shit, but i'll make it short so you don't have to sit here and read my entire life story. so, here goes:

i started snorting coke when i was thirteen, so, i did coke for about three years. i mean, i did other drugs, too, but coke was my biggest problem. i guess, if you think of it, i should have overdosed multiple times. hell, i should be dead. or close to dead. but, yeah, i finally overdosed. they did a scan 'cause i was tweaking shit in the hospital, and, turns out, i got mild brain damage from the overdose. i've obtained a small stutter, but that's really all i've noticed about it so far. anyway! i was in rehab for twenty-eight days, and it was shit. all the other girls on my wing decided it would be fun to talk shit about me and make me the outcast. on the plus side, though, i wasn't distracted by "rehab friends", i was actually doing what the fuck i was supposed to be doing. so, i've been out of rehab for a few days now, and i haven't used cocaine once (or any other drug). i'm really proud of myself. i feel like shit, though. physically and mentally. just... i feel dead. idk how else to put it. /: i mean, i'm happy i'm getting clean, but i want to get fucked up sooo bad. and it sucks, 'cause i know that if i go back to that, i will die. ummm... yeah. i guess i just wanted to tell my story really quick.

finally: i'm starting a ronnie radke fic called "still reverberates". this is the summary that i wrote:
"charlie prescot never wanted to be a prostitute, but, when her abusive boyfriend forced her into his sex and drug trafficking ring, everything turned upside down. her life went even farther to shit than it already was. when her boyfriend was caught and sent to prison, charlie thought the ring would be over; that she'd be free. much to her dismay, a new ring leader stepped in. charlie knew she'd be stuck in that life forever. when charlie was forced to look for clients in a las vegas punk rock club, she's entranced by the vocalist for the live band of the night. and he's entranced by her. they sleep together later that night. in the morning, charlie is gone from his apartment. but the vocalist doesn't want to give up. he decides to find the girl, knowing only her first name... but that was a bad idea."

so, yeah. i hope you guys read it! obviously, it's going to be nc-17. but, yeah! also, if you like t. mills, i just started a t. mills story called "another missed call". so, if you wanna check that out, that would be ill as hell. (: