So first I know what you're thinking, how dare i have the nerve to call this entry day 2, well its my journal i can name my entries whatever i want even if its been way more than a day between this entry and the last entry.
So lets start with my random thoughts, the biggest one on my mind that keeps popping up everytime i send it away? love. i hate the girls that only talk about their love life all the time, and i promise not to be one of those girls but since this journal is supposed to be exploring my mind, then by dammit i am going to type what the hell is going on up there.
So my current boyfriend zach and I are still together, so far its been two months, but i have a problem with that, not the relationship its self, the fact that it has been two months honestly scares me. every relationship i have been in so far has never gone past two months (if the good ones even got that far because i dated this one boy named will for two days.) so im scared. I asked my friend shelby who has been in a relationship with her boyfriend for about 6 months, if she felt scared at points with her boyfriend brian, she said yeah and she reassured me that every girl goes through it. so hopefully as i am writing this me and shelby helped one girl with those stupid buzzing thoughts (yea i know how it feels). I am very lucky though, he treats me like a princess and tells me he loves me 1000 times a day and you know when you are in a relationship with a guy and its only for the sex? well zach isnt like that at all. he even said that he really dosent care about the sex, he just wants to be with me and i know that sounds like something from one of those teen lifetime movies that you and your mom end up watching together sometimes but hey im 16.
Another random thought i hate when my father gets mad over me not watching some episodes of star trek with him. Hey i actually like star trek (i admit im a trekkie) but when he puts it one me like some sort of burden it upsets me, i dont wanna watch it with him at all when he acts like a toddler and becomes mad that i dont sacrfice an hour of my time to watch it with him. i know hes trying to father and daughter bond but really i just wanna be left alone.
other random part of my brain, im am starting to smoke again. while i was outside smoking today, i asked myself why because i dont really get like headaches or anything when i stop but i do get cravings. i guess thats why im still smoking. i still remember the day i got caught, im still sort of grounded from that shit. but o well my parents said they wouldnt care when im 18 and smoke but if thats only two years away, then i dont understand why i cnt just do what i want now and that probably sounds like really stupid or something but i dont care. this is my brain.
So those were only some random parts, i will probably think some more in bed but will be waaay too lazy to wake my laptop up and type them in this journal. after all it is 2am where i am. until next time.
.__. MY BRAIN! <3
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