I can't breath without you.. But I have too;

Have you ever felt like you were torn in two? One part of you loving your husband, Living with ease and the other part...So dead and lost feeling, hurting and trying to get to that other person.

He's my bestfriend, Although we are so much MORE then that. We do more then flirt... Do more then just care about each other. I need him like I need a heartbeat.. Like a lung needs air!

I thought that when I got married, It would stop, That my two halves would re-join and I would be fine... I'd get over the feeling I get when I see him online, I'd stop loving him and thinking of him as "more then just a friend"

He knows ofcourse, All my feelings, All my thoughts. Yet... We still continue to play with fire without getting burned. He knows I'm torn in two, how I hate I can't give my husband my all. I want too... I wish I could.

I'd met my husband SECOND. 8 months after meeting my Best Friend. I know that those 8 months change EVERYTHING! Because when I had met my Best friend I was going through A LOT! He had helped me with a lot and by the time I had met my husband, My best friend had helped me so much and I had already fallen in love with him. We could've been together, If it wasn't for the fact that he was in love with someone else... Sure, He loved me... But SHE was always going to be FIRST.

He stopped talking about her, After I confessed it made me depressed. But I still find out from out mutual friend that he still talks about her. After four years of her hurting him, and me being there to pick up the pieces, He's still chooses her...

I would never CHEAT on my husband, But the things me and my best friend talk about... I feel like I am at times. He knows more about me then my own husband. He understands me better then my husband.

I'm torn in two and I don't know what to do... I don't know what to do!