What if...?

I know I shouldn't focus on the what ifs. I know that they only distract me from what's actually going on. I know I know I know I need to keep giving this to God and trust that whatever happens will happen in His timing.

But I can't help but think what if...
What if this becomes something serious? What if this attraction has serious potential? What if it really goes somewhere? What if he's the one? What if, what if, what if...

And I know what Susanna and Chelsea would say if I told them this.
"Pray."
"Trust God."
"Be patient."
"God's timing is perfect."

Things I know. I know I know I know.
And then those two words come sneaking back in.

What if...

Because all of those what ifs make me feel almost giddy. They make my heart pound, the butterflies take over, and I just keep thinking that Sunday cannot possibly get here fast enough.