Late Night..

Ive been falling asleep on and off tonight.. but for some reason i cant just sleep.. too many thoughts clouding my mind.. distorting my visions.. what i want to be will never be.. what i see will never be me.. I dont know.. so twisted and confused.. wanting to shed everything and everyone unknown by me.. checking applications dropping those that judge me or never speak to me.. I dont need you.. just like you dont need me.. and ill show you.. ill prove it to you...

Sitting here silently talking to myself thinking of the next step....

while debating what i should do i know i should sleep.. allow myself to fall into a deep slumber.. but is it possible at all?? too much pain.. physically mentally and emotionally...

Tired of being alone.. waiting for you when i know your not waiting for me.. i wish GOD would send me someone else.. make my thoughts as straight as a board in stead of all over the place.. SMH... so lost and confused!

Good night