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I just keep on avoiding showing my feelings
I just keep on running from situations I am afraid of.
I am just so scared
of losing you.
I put all of my effort into being with you
and I feel like you don't even see this.
I work out every single day to get a little skinnier for you
I shut my mouth every day to get less annoying for you
I beat myself up every day cuz you always make it seem somehow
that you don't want me
that you are sick of me
that you have lost interest.
if i bring this up to anyone, they say it's not a good relationship
but why would i still be trying for you
if knew you didnt love me back.
the lump of sadness growing in the back of my throat is always there
i could easily start crying any second
i hate every inch of my body
my skin.
i hate every noise that comes out of my mouth.
i hate how i react to things
i hate how you dont see
how much i fucking love you
i love you so much
i take every risk necessary to keep you
i want to be with you forever
live with you
have kids with you
because i love talking to you
i love being with you
seeing you
and feeling you.
i feel like i'll just be your longtime girlfriend you had back in high school
and that you will simply move on..
i feel like i'll be left, to never forget about you
to stay alone.
i can't let my mind
love anybody else
i can't go on without you
i can't see my future without you...