Wanna know what hurts?

Do you really want to know what hurts?
What ruined my night, and makes me want to pick up that razor again?
What makes my cry even thinking about it?
When one of your "best friends" goes behind your back and tells a secret you told them to some chick that hates you. When you had a friend, that was always there. That never gave up on you, stood up for you, and then BAM. She's just like everyone else. It hurts.
Since I found out about what she did, I've picked up a razor three times. Since last night. I didn't do anything, because I'm not going back to the time when I did. Why, you ask?
Because that "friend" is the one who helped me get out of that black hole I was in. She's the one who helped me stop cutting.
In my head right now, I'm thinking, "Mallory, what the hell are you thinking? Cutting? But why? Because, my only true friend, that I thought I had, turned on me. Spread my sh*t. Back stabbed me, again. Now I might as well." So I think I will whenever I get finished writing this.
I took her to Bayfest with me. It's this concert thing, like a music festival. That day we came back was the day she started acting different. She was putting me down straight to my face. Saying I had horrible taste in music, saying that she was going to ignore me from now on. That sh didn't want to hear anything I had to say about my weekend, but then she would tell me all about hers. I honestly can't say how much this hurts.Not to mention, I have major trust issues, but having the one person you could fully trust turn on you? It sucks.