Finally

What was that? Kristen finally got what she wanted? No strings attached, no problems. Just pure success?

AHAHAH. No.

This isn't a dreamland. This is real life. Every positive had a negative effect. Further explanation ensues...

I watched Requiem for a Dream and it related to me entirely. These people let their addictions consume them. It drove them crazy and they had absolutely no control. Although, they started the ball rolling. This is exactly what I did.

I saw what I wanted: this regular boy who no one seemed to care all that much about, someone that truly was never listened to, and I wanted to be this savior image hat I try so much to fill. The way I could get to this was to get in to his mind. Of course, the easiest way is through his heart. I did just that, and went through hell to get to it.

My two best friends stayed entirely angry at me for a while. One didn't talk to me for two weeks longer than the other. My good friend claimed I didn't care for her feelings, since she liked him and he denied her. I was called heartless and careless, a bad friend. My ex-boyfriend who is still in love and still believes he can have me became more heart broken.

All for what.

For some high school guy.

But, my friends accept my decision and apologized. They realized sometimes you need to do things for yourself.

Who knows if its worth it. No one ever does until the end.