Feelings. (#2)

I've been crying for a while now, on and off. I made a video about her. I think I'm obsessing. Well, I really can't help myself. I mean, we've done almost everything in the book, and she expects me to forget all of that? She would say, 'forever and always, babe.' Turns out she's no good at making promises. Breaking them seems to be her strong point, along with lying. For example, when we were engaged (I now realize that that was definitely a stupid idea) she said she wasn't ready for a serious relationship. She left me for a guy. Every time she's left me, it's been for a guy. But, she loves him for real this time... No more kisses in the girls bathroom at school, just false reassurances that she hasn't given up. But the ring tells the truth. No more kissing in the bathroom, no more 'I love you' 's, no more spending the night, no more I say, NO MORE! But how am I gonna make it through this? She's a drug and I'm addicted. But, she's addicted to him... I can't run away 'cause that makes the impact hit even harder when you have to come back and everything's the same. How am I supposed to forget if everything reminds me of her? How am I supposed to forget when I see her every day? If her laughter echoes through my head? Or when I remember that one night... Andrew...' she groaned softly. But it wasn't Andrew who was there with her... It wasn't Andrew at all. (The Andrew we're talking about isn't the same one i fell in love with). It was me... That still hurts. She was picturing me as him. She... She didn't want me at all, it was Andrew she wanted.