Saying goodbye to 2011

Here in South Africa 2012 is already on hour old.

I'm looking forward to this year and I hope that it brings some new and interesting things my why.

The previous year had been one of the most difficult that I have ever experienced.

My dad, who had meant the world to me had fallen ill. He ended up in hospital on a respirator. Just when we thought that he was out of the woods he took a turn for the worst. Within a matter of 3 days he had deteriorated to such a degree that on 17 August 2011 at about 20h00 he just could not fight any longer.

He lost his battle and left on his last great adventure.

This was devistating for me and I felt that there was no end to my sorrow. Somehow in my mind my Dad had been invincible and would always be there to comfort and give advice.

The reality of him not being there could just not sink in. My world had for all intents and pupposes come to an end.

After a while I became numb and was able to turn off those sad feelings, not a good idea. This all came to an end when I was driving one day.

Everybody hurts by REM playing on my radio. It had been my dad's favorite song. I couldn't help it the walls came down and the pain came flooding back. Needless to say that was one of the bad days.

Things are getting better day by day. I don't think I will ever be able to think of my Dad without the sadness of knowing that he isn't here anymore, but I know that I will be able to go on.

I can now start thinking back to things that he had done that had made me smile or listen to his favorite song without bursting into tears.

Dad - I will always miss you. I'm entering this new year with hope and a feeling that somewhere you are watching all of us.

Yes this year will definately be better than last year.

I'll grab it by the horns and live my life to the fullest. I'll enjoy the things that I love and cut out the things that do me no good.

Life is too short for regrets or negativity.

Here is to a Positive 2012