g.e.d and life hows it real going!!

well it almost that time were I'm coming to a end with my g.e.d I'm so happy but so frustrate I'm into going the hard math in whitesboro i was in basic math and also in special ed but what i learned from it is a small group is good for me case when i get around bunch of people i start to freak out and go in my shell I'm blunt but also shy person at the same time I'm kind and good and amazing person but i also take so much bullshit and crap my way its so hard for express myself i mean I'm great stories writer hard into music buti don't share my work i think after all i been going threw i think time the world see me different I'm not changing everything just few things ....and i made so much new friends i love them all and thank for being around threw this hard time I'm going threw ...NOW TO MY LIFE PART: yeah where to start life has giving some slaps and kicks i feel like I'm heading down that road again where I'm being stupid i never learn from my mistakes is so hard to put all this past me i just want to make to college and find a job and get the hell outta my mom house and make something of myself for once but every time i do i end up messing up...and now i end up learning a big mistake from all this i feel i lost all my best friends i up attacking one them last night i guess i have alot of feeling for him then i realized and i guess i have lot of jealous in me but i can't help it this me feeling lonely again i guess i want someone here cause everything bad is happening all once i need someone to hold me and tell me its going to be alright ...now i have to patch things up with him Tuesday I'm so worry ed he going to hate me and everything that hap pend i would n't be surprised ... but one thing is out of it i made some awesome real friends and the story does have a happy ending =) i mean all i need to do is stop flying off the handle bars and keep my mouth shut and I'm good lol!!! but that all i have for you take care ..and i will write more