I AM SO SICK AND TIRED OF READING THIS. Are writers really that fucking stupid? There are one million different fucking ways to write about their character passing out. How un-fucking-creative IS that? Holy shit. Any avid reader would understand what I am talking about. And on top of that, it kills the reading entirely. All the hype is dead. For example:
“Alice’s heart started racing. Looking down at her dying lover terrified her. It all became too much and suddenly, everything went black.”
HOW UNAPPEALING IS THAT? Oh, you think it can’t be written in any other way? Let me show you one out of the many ways to write this better.
“Alice’s heart sped up as she looked down to her dying lover. She was scared. She was scared that we was no longer going to be able to spend days walking through the fields with him, afternoons drinking tea or nights cuddled up on the couch while they shared a cup of hot chocolate. Everything terrified Alice. As her heart began to quicken, the memories flashed more vividly through her mind. Quicker and faster they came and went, just as her lover’s heart did. The adrenaline became too much for her to handle and, just like her lover, she faded away from consciousness entering a world of their memories.”
That’s way more exciting to read. People need to get their shit together.
COME ON, PEOPLE. WE'RE WRITERS.
