The need to express ones self is an everlasting desire.

I've tried many times during my life to write a diary, but I just can't. I always feel the need to express my feeling through writing though, I don't know why. All of my poems, they are directly related to my life, and my feelings at the time. And they do help, but sometimes it isn't enough. So I've taken to writing notes to my ex (apparently I'm his only friend left, go figure). He says he doesn't mind, but I feel like I should stop. I still harbor a lot of resentment from what he did to me 4 months ago. I still love him, and I always will, but the thought of EVER being with him in that way again repulses me. Perhaps, if anyone's interested, ill explain what happened between him and i in one of these. I still care, very much. And I'm sure that some of the things that I say to him hurt him a lot. I mean, he really deserves it, but I'm beyond trying to hurt him. The things I say aren't hateful, it just what I'm feeling and I need to get it out. So perhaps writing these journals can be an alternative way to get my feelings out. Having people actually be able to read these makes it different than a diary, so maybe I'll be able to continue doing this. If you care to hear the story of what happened, and what he did to me, just ask. Thank you for listening.