This is why I'm undateable, why are you?

80% of the time I’m in pajamas while the other 20% consist of looking like a homeless person.

I like holding hands too much.

I don’t know how to act “normal” out in public.

I don’t smoke.

I HATE the taste of beer.

If I think you’re being dumb I will tell you the bluntest way possible.

I won’t tell you what you want to hear.

I won’t make a sandwich for you, I will make my own and make you watch while I eat it.

I won’t text anyone, we can have a face to face conversation if not give me a call.

I like Harry Potter and The Lord of The Rings too much.

I claim to be mentally married to various fictional characters.

I let my love for sex be known, which apparently is not acceptable for a girl to do, fuck you I
really like fucking.

My sense of humor is like noone else’s on the face of this earth apparently, screw what you say I happen to be hilarious.

I happen to be an incredibly paranoid and jealous person.

I’m not romantic, I loathe romantic because it ends up making me look like an ass.

I will bother you with a lot of Pokemon talk.

I’m not a “gamer girl” but I will play non-stop and ignore you if I happen to like a game.

I will forever judge you if you get Link and Princess Zelda confused.

I will drag you to an Anime convention with me and yes I will make you get Cosplay.

I quote Lord of the Rings in Elvish, quite often.

I will get into very serious arguments about movies, some may even turn physical.

I have collectibles.

I whine about my weight while eating YOUR junk food.

I obsess over every little thing.

I wont want to be every single passing moment with you, I need my space.

Some days I happen to be extremely shallow and I admit it.

I will listen to a song in repeat for 6 hours straight on full blast.

I will never remember an anniversary of any kind unless I write it down.

I only have nightmares, dreams are rare. Yes, I want you to hold me.

I like staring at myself a little too much.

I cry more over nothing than things that actually matter.

I have taken up stalking, it’s a terrific hobbie.

My best friends will most likely be more important than you for quite a while.

Earning my trust will be harder than getting to Mordor.

I will pick movies over people any given day.

I treat my pets like real children and not just any children but as if I gave birth to them.

If you don’t like Star Wars or Star Trek, I will judge you.

My brother is my best friend. He comes first in every situation.

Shit taste in music is unacceptable.

I can not flirt to save my life.

I wear layers of clothing, I will not get naked for anyone.

Parents tend to hate me.

As far as personality goes my expectations are sky high.

I’m really immature.

I am the biggest asshole you will ever meet.

I’m very needy.

I contradict myself on a daily basis.

I tend to be very geeky.

My body is hideous.

I insult people I love.