That you wanted to die? 'Cuz that's about how I'm feeling right about now.
Today was my best friend's 16th birthday. Kind of a big day. I spent all morning cleaning my own house so that I could go over and spend the day with her.
As I expected, her boyfriend was there too but I was fine with that. I've never properly met the boy before (which seems weird in itself, doesn't it?) and so I figured it would be a good time. I'm sure he's a nice guy but I wouldn't know since I talked to both of them a total of about three times the whole night. They were too busy being all coupley to notice the rest of us. Which is really sad because there were only seven of us there: My best friend, her boyfriend, her mom, her sister, two of her cousins, and me.
I'll admit that I'm jealous of her and her boyfriend. Ridiculously jealous. They're adorable together. I've never had a serious boyfriend, but if I did I'd want it to be like their relationship. I'm just sick of getting blown off for him.
Anyway, the first couple hours we all sat around while they kissed and held hands and flirted and wrestled and sh*t. Then we ate and she opened presents. Then they went out to his car and talked for another couple hours. She probably wouldn't have even noticed if I wasn't there.
And that story I started writing for her? She didn't look twice at it. It's probably in the garbage right now. I'm just so sick of everything. She's my best friend, but sometimes I feel like I'm not hers.
She spent her birthday exactly how she spent mine. With her boyfriend. Except I didn't see her once on my birthday and I didn't find out she was with him until about a week later. She told me she was sick.
Maybe I'm so upset because I don't really have anyone to give affection to. I NEED SOMEONE TO LOVE! D:
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