Well, it's finally happening.. 4-26-2012

I know I've said this before, but I am actually writing a story! And unlike the last few times, I'm going to stick with it. I've already started writing it, and I know where I want it to go. (Kind of) It's not going to be a fan fiction, like I had previously wanted my first story to be. Instead it's going to be completely original, which is quite terrifying for me. I know that no one will ever probably read it, (and I'm cool with that) but I still want to make it worth while, just in case someone does decide to read it. It might take me a while, but I really am determined this time. Not because I'm bored and looking for something to do, but because I'm completely lost and alone and can't seem to write poems about how I feel, so I figured I'd pour all my time and energy into this, and hopefully it will help.

So the reason I'm writing this, is because... well I'm not actually sure.. I guess I could use some encouragement? I just read through all of the poems I've posted on here, and though I do like at least one of them, I'm still not proud of them. I just don't want to put everything I have into something that might not be worth it at the end.. But maybe that's just my self consciousness taking over.. I don't know, I'm just really lost and I need something to hold on to. I feel like there's no where for me to go, and no one to turn to.. And that scares me. But since I doubt anyone will read this either, I might as well continue writing. Or go to bed, considering it's 1am and I'm sitting outside on the damp ground in the dark alone.. Eh, who am I kidding, I'd never be able to sleep anyway. Writing it is.
April 26th, 2012 at 10:20am