Random

So I finally decided after it being long overdue and the woman practically begging me, I have decided that I want counselling. So I speak to the woman and it's going to be 2WEEKS until my appointment, I mean really? They beg you to have it then make you wait 2 weeks. Urg. Good job I'm not suicidal isn't it?

I messed up one of my friends relationships :/ I stood back watching him hurt her and I decided enough was enough. Normally we get along well and make sense out each others crazy actions, we are both pretty messed up. Anywho, I may have had a go at him and then he broke up with her! So now I feel guilty and she's a little but mad at me. Not a good day for me.

I miss him. With all my heart, it's funny I've never put so much effort into loving him than what I am now and he doesn't even want me. I don't understand. I seem to love him more with every day I don't have him. Don't get me wrong I loved him so much when we was together, but I thought something was missing so I ended it. But I soon realised the piece that was missing was me. I was missing a part of myself because I wasn't over an event that happened a few years before. So now I miss him it hurts. I miss him more because I miss our baby I would have inside me if I hadnt had a termination. Which I also regret and was well the worst thing I've ever been through and done. But there isn't anything I can do. I let him go, and he went.

On a brighter note, in 17 weeks I am going to the Dominican republic for 2 weeks in a 5 star resort. I am so excited, it's just what I need right now. Wow my life is slight mental right now. No wander my tutor at college thinks I need counselling. But that's just half of it, I've not even mentioned my family/home drama.

WOW. So I needed to just have a little rant and just let go of everything. So have fun reading commenting. Or not doing either I just fancied a very Long let go of my life issues.