I don't know if anyone else has this problem but I have a friend who only wants to hang out with me when he is between girlfriends. He claims that he can't find any better friends than me and my husband but as soon as a girl comes along he pushes all his friends to the side. I have known him since he was a small boy and use to protect him from his older brothers. My husband went to school with him and use to hang out with him all the time. We have been there for him through a lot and I guess that is why it bothers me so much.
When he met this girl she was still married but was with him anyway. They had a baby together and then she left him for her husband. We were there for him and helped him through that tough time. He told us that we were more important than any girl he could ever be with and he would never turn his back on us. A few months later she was bringing his son around and he would ignore use if she was around. Once she was gone he would start talking to us again. I just assumed he was doing what she said because of his son but later found out it was because she didn't like us. I've never met the woman before so she doesn't have a reason not to like me or my husband.
Once they ended things that time he was back to being himself and hanging out with us on the weekend. He moved out of town and still came to see us on a regular basis. The last time we hung out with him he never once mentioned that he was back with her and that she was expecting another baby. We all had a great time hanging out with other friends and then that weekend he brought his other two boys from his ex wife over to see us. That was the last time we saw or talked to him and then he posted that he had another baby and sure enough it was with her. He stopped talking to us and then posted the other day that he was in a relationship with her again and we found out he has been ignoring his other friends as well. I know I should stop talking to him but I'm a loyal friend and can't turn my back on him. I'm beginning to wonder if I'm wasting my time on a friendship where the other person only wants to be around when the new woman in his life isn't around.
I went through a rough time a few months ago with someone who claimed to be my friend and then she screwed me over and I had to walk away from the friendship. That is why I'm having a tough time of pushing him out of my life because I value people I feel are true friends. I think that he is really just doing what she says and if he really got away from her he would be the same old guy we knew when he was younger and before her.
The fake friends don't always show themselves at first but they do know how to stab you in the back the first chance you get. The girl I mentioned earlier stole some stuff from me after talking us into moving down south. Once we were there they waited until they thought we didn't have the money to get back to Ohio or even a place to stay and told us to leave their home when I was one week away from getting our own place and joining my husband at his place of employment. Once we left they had stolen a GPS system, my Chihuahua, a router, clothes, and my microphone for the WII along with Rockband 3. I cut her out of my life and things seemed to get better.
Now I'm stuck with the choice of dropping a guy who I always felt was a true friend or keeping him in my life even though he only wants to be around us when he isn't with his current girlfriend. I know that some of the other guys who hang out with him have turned their backs on him and I'm having a hard time in following in their footsteps. I hate to think that this girl is driving all his friends out of his life but you can't change it if he doesn't see what is happening. I just hope that I can make my decision soon and that he doesn't lose all his friends just because she doesn't think his friends are good enough to have around. I would welcome any an all advice. I guess I'm too soft hearted and let people get the best of me before I believe the worst of them. I need to get over doing that and stop trusting as easily as I have in the past.
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