Mom's Troubles, Friends that I used to Know

So this is my last year in High School (I'm in the middle of the year 'cause I'm from Chile) and the idea of getting out is terryfing me, besides of all the problems I've had this couple of days with my mom, she's been really anoying about everything; she had bassically called me a whore since I lost the big V, she made me think that I was pregnant & I was freaking out!! but it turns out that I'm not *thankfully*, she's been really anoying with the "what are you gonna do after school?" and honestly I DON'T FUCKING KNOW! is really horrible, yesterday i fight with her and she told me she cried and I didn't feel anything, not a single drop of guilt or sorry, I just get going with what I was doing.

I'm also terrified of loose my best friends, the ones who I can really be myself, say whatever the fuck I want, not pretending being someone I'm not. We've had our problems, like any friend, but I think that those situations make or friendship stronger, I remember this year my guy best friend got mad at me 'cause I was bugging him with a bitch he was starting to date (later you'll know why I called her like that) andhe got pessed and angry with me, and I though that we will be okay at the next day but he ignored me and it obviously make me sad, a week pass and he still wasn't talking to me, you may guest how I felt, I was really really sad until one day a start to cry in the classroom (the worst place you could ever cry) and nobody seems to understand how I felt, I really missed him that week and everybody said "you'll be fine, he soon will talk to you again" but no one knows that he's really prideful and he wouldn't come closer to me a say anything, so my girl best friend told him, while I was wiping my tears, that I was crying, so when I went out he took me by the shoulder and hug me, I think it was the most significant hug that we have ever gave, I start to hit him saying "stupid I hate you" with a smile on my face, he hug me one more time and he told me "I love you, say it back!" so I said it back "I love you dumbass" and I hit him again, I think it was the first time that we said that to each other, it was really cool. After that I felt that the weight on my cheest that I had was gone, but that day made me realize who were the true friends and the fakes, with my girl best friend I was a little away, 'cuz I though that she had replace me with another, but it turns out that the day I cried in the classroom, she was the first who hug me and said "everything will be alright you'll see, he's just to proud", and I realise that she was real, that I could count with her for whatever thing that I needed...