I need to vent... (swearing)

It starts with 50 Shades of what the fuck ever. I didn’t like it 2 years ago when it was Master of the Universe and considering the majority of “editing” she’s done is changing the names from Twilight related to the new ones, I won’t like the book, so I won’t read it. But if you liked it, fair play to you…

I haven’t got a problem with the fact that it used to be fanfiction and she’s now published it. It’s her story, she can do with it as she sees fit. Good on her for that, what I DO have a problem with is the fact that it’s badly written, there are scores of errors not picked up by her OR the copy editor. Now I know not all errors will be picked up, that’s fine, but please. Another thing that bugs the hell out of me is the mass reader base that she has claiming that Christian is hot and the perfect man… er, no. He’s abusive, controlling and frankly, a bit of a cunt. And Ana… she’s just a dumb cow who’s easily led.

I have nothing against Icy/E.L. James and will never slag her off personally. A) I don’t know her and b) what gives me the right to attack her just because I’m jealous. Yep, I admitted it like many other’s are too scared to do. I’m jealous of the fact that she is a published author. This is something I have aspired to be for as long as I can remember.

But I know for a fact that it will never happen. I am the type of person who HATES my own writing. I love writing, I truly do as it’s a way for me to escape, but I hate reading it back and am always surprised when other people read it and like it. because of this, I will never approach publishing houses for fear of rejection and I’m wary of the self publishing route or going down the e book side of things with small online publishers… I have just come to accept that I will never walk into a bookshop (or supermarket) and see MY book for sale.

The whole 50 thing has made me even more wary. What if I did get published and people actually bought my books. I couldn’t stand the utter ridicule to the level that she’s getting. Yes, people like her stuff, but just as many hate it with a passion. I couldn’t cope with that.

I gave up writing and porting fanfiction for many reasons, the main being that unless you “know” the right people, no one pimps out your fics thus no one reads reviews. This is regardless of quality. I have read some amazingly brilliant fics that have thousands of reviews, but I have also seen utter tripe with just as many. Unfortunately, these are the ones that tend to get the most notice.

I’m not saying I’m a fantastic writer (I refuse to use the word author as I am unpublished) who deserved millions of people reading, reviewing and talking about my fics, far from it. But too many fic writers have seen the success of 50 and are now jumping on the erotica bandwagon. Just because your lemon filled fanfic has x amount of readers, it doesn’t mean that what you’ve written is actually good. Most people read fanfic just for unrealistic sex rather than any kind of plot. Just cause you can don’t mean you should.

Before anyone has a go, I’m not talking about anyone in particular, I am in a bitch mood and am mainly generalising. But it’s things like this that seriously make me consider giving up writing altogether.