The Last Gate Keeper/Crow Volume 1: The Road/ School Stuff

So I was reading the above story (current title/previous title) and today I went to read the update I had up and the story was gone! I have absolutely no idea what happened. I was wondering if anyone knows why it seems to no longer exist. Or, if this has happened to anyone else before? The last chapter I read left off at a cliffhanger and now I will never get to know what happens. Or maybe I will, but no in the immediate future.

BLAH!

On another completely unrelated note, I got hit on at the mall the other day. My cousin was buying a fancy straightener from a kiosk and as we were leaving the guy was following us and said to me "Come back in three years, maybe we could go out." It was totally creepy. And I'm still not sure if he wanted me to come back when I'm 19 (he knew I was 16) or if he is just bad at quick math. The only other time I have been hit on was a similar situation with a guy at the library. He gave me his number though (which I tore up and threw out) and tried to make actual conversation first before asking me to contact him when I'm legal. What. The. Fuck.

I have a boyfriend, so I wouldn't go out with anyone else at the moment anyways, but how come only creeps come onto me? How come the cute, sweet guys at my school don't find me attractive enough to ask out? I would say no, but it's nice to be noticed in that way, ya know? Total self-esteem boost. Maybe this school year will be different, but I seriously doubt it. The only new kids for sure with be dinky little Freshies, and for the most part everyone in my classes will be the same. With Honors and AP classes, you generally end up staying with the same kids year after year (if you continue in those classes/stay at the same school). With it still being summer and not being friends with a lot of the other kids in my classes, I already have a general idea of who's going to be there on the first day of school.

I'm going to miss so many of my friends this year. There's a college across the street from my school, and they have a program that you can apply for where you take the remainder of your high school classes on their campus and take college classes at the same time. A lot of my friends were accepted into that (they mostly applied because my school starts at 7 AM and for the other thing you can start your day at noon if you want, depending on the classes you take). The ones who aren't joining that either moved to a different house (no longer being zoned for my school) or moved out of state. I usually only have a few friends in my classes anyways, but now there's going to be even less. I guess that can be good because I talk to them and don't pay attention in class sometimes (which brings down my grade. And that in turn makes me angry with myself because I have extremely high standards for myself. Anything less than at A is not acceptable, and even a low one is cutting it close because I have less leeway to do badly on the semester final ((not that I would do that on purpose mind you))). I can become kind of awkward when I'm not around anyone I'm friends with, though. I'm not really the kind of person to just strike up a conversation with someone and make friends. I usually stick to my friends, their friends, and people who talk to me first. Last year, I got so used to having friends in classes that I don't know how I'm going to be able to sit there and not talk to anyone this year (if I have to, which I might). I'll probably spend a lot of time awkwardly fidgeting in my seat and picking at my fingers/biting my nails/twirling my hair/playing with anything I can get my hands on (nervous habits/I have a hard time sitting still a lot of the time).

ANDDDD

On top of possibly not having friends in my classes, I am going to be SUPER busy. I am taking 3 honors classes, 2 AP classes, the most advanced dance class at my school that is offered (which preforms at assemblies and gets more dances in shows and the like), I'm in National Honor Society, and I'm the Vice-President of the Gay-Straight Alliance at my school. I have no idea how all of that is going to work out. I am SUPER afraid that I'm going to have a situation like a mandatory dance rehearsal/show as well as some activity or meeting for NHS. The homework and stuff for my classes I usually do DURING shows and stuff it needed. And if I can tear myself away from my dance girls long enough to actually focus. Last time, my friend Morgan left lipstick kisses all over my vocabulary for World History, and I spent more time requesting songs for my friend Angela to play on the piano than looking up words anyways. People in the audience have NO IDEA the kind of random/crazy/dramatic stuff that goes on back stage.

I was an assistant stage manager at my last show, and there was a situation that I had to deal with where a girl in my dance class stole another girl's tickets for the show. From what I heard, Girl 1 got them for her family for Wednesday and lost them. Girl 2 "found" for tickets for Wednesday and was trying to exchange them for Friday. (I would use real names, but I DO NOT want someone to read this and tell Girl 2 that I was talking shit or something and have her come and try to beat my ass or something). Girl 1 isn't a very nice person (she is one of those "I have so much money look at it and my tanned ass" dramatic bitches), but I felt so badly for her. She was bawling her eyes out and totally freaking. Nobody deserves anything that would make them react in such a way.

There was also this one incident my freshman year where a cuss-out drag-out "don't you dare talk about my girl like that you fucking bitch" battle went on in my dressing room over a spilled soda. Literally.

And all of this shit happens while the show is going on.

Dance girls are crazy. (And I know that I am one of them, but I try to avoid as much drama as possible)

ANYWAYS,

This has turned into so much more that was originally intended. I just kind of went with the flow and kept typing. If you know anything about the story, let me know please!

Have a wonderful day!

~Payton