1. You cannot possibly be ugly or plain if some motherfreaking sex god wants to bang you-likes you-loves you. Honestly.
2. And if two motherfreaking sex gods are fighting over you then you need to open your eyes sister because you must be fucking beautiful.
3. Your best friend is a hottie with a body who you've known your whole life and knows you better than anyone but despite the sexual tension so thick you could cut it with a knife you guys view each other as friends. Yeah, right. Skip the whole, get a boyfriend so your best friend finally realizes he likes you and just rip each other’s clothes off. Okay, thanks.
4. Okay, so you don’t do normally do one night stands, yet here you are with some random guy. That part is reasonable, sure. But this rare one night stand ends up to be the best sex of your life and your one night stand’s life? And you guys can’t forget about each other after it? What are the odds?
5. You know how people say there is that Mary Sue character? Well there definitely is a Marley Sam character (aka the male Mary Sue, in case you didn’t pick up on that). Seriously, he’s smart and handsome and patient and charming AND he helps you deal with your shit? REAL HUMANS HAVE FLAWS. Really, it’d be nice if you’d mess up once in a while.
6. If you get yourself in a sticky enough situation, some prince charming will come and save you. 100% success rate in stories, 12% success rate in real life.
7. Three words: friends with benefits.
8. Babies are apparently magical and if you accidentally have one with someone, chances are you guys will fall in love. Even if this person initially hates you.
9. If your ideal life plan doesn’t work out, then become a stripper. It always works out for them in the end. Haven’t you seen the movie Pretty Women?
10. And if all else fails, just pray to god that you catch a werewolf or vampires eye.
Despite the whole sarcastic snarky tone of this rant, I actually do like stories with these cliches. It's just some times they are so so so overdone it's as if I know exactly what is coming next.
I don't mean to offend anyone with this! It's just for fun and I am more than guilty of reading/writing these cliches. Make sure to comment any I missed!
P.S. Most of these I've seen in Hockey fanfics.
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