Reminds Me That There's a Time to Change.

I'm so sick of feeling sorry for myself. What a great way to spend my life right? Feeling sorry for myself. Everyone has bad things that happen in their life, and i'm sitting here wasting mine focusing on the bad times, when there has been so many good ones. I have a close family, who most of the time acts like they love me, then i have the ones that i don't talk to anymore. I have friends who don't give a shit about me, but i have a few that have never let me down. I have a boyfriend that i love so freaking much, and i don't use that word if i don't mean it, and he's been here for me so much that i feel like i don't deserve it. Like you guys don't even know. I would give my life for this kid. But i'm still sitting here worrying about my past and how its going to affect who i turn out to be. I try to forget about it, but its hard. I haven't had an easy life, but the last thing i want from people is pity from it. I want to be known for the person i am now, not who i use to be. I want to be known for what i do, not what was done. And im beginning to realize that what was done is what's holding me back from being... me. And im so ready to forget about it. But it's not that easy, never has been, never will be. But i'm so grateful for the friends that have stuck with me, the family that always has my back in the end, and the guy whose loved me through the nights that i stayed up and cried to him. Im so freaking grateful and i'll never be able to thank these people for what they've done. And i probably never will. But i have time to change right? I'm still young.

Love Always,
Beee.