...a cat tree

Hello.

I have a big announcement to make that may shock you all, like, full-on shock. I'd make sure you are sitting down for this one...basically, I have a cat tree in my stomach. Don't write me off! That's what my mum did, but anyway, yes, it's true. 3 times now, my stomach has meowed, and I mean an ACTUAL meow. It didn't just sound a little bit like one, it WAS one.

I would go into my whole predicament of 'what if my stomach acids kill the cat tree?', 'what if there's some way I could pull the cats free through my belly button?' or 'what are they eating to survive?' but I don't want to lose all of you lot because I have serious problems. Like, I was genuinely thinking about this last night. It kept me up. Do you think the NHS would do a 'remove-cat-tree-from-stomach operation' for me? Or would I be best going private?

...why am I still talking?

In other, unrelated, news, Rachael said that our ymas tickets came yesterday (*cheers*) so that's good :D I'm excited for it now, even if our seats are ridiculously shit, it'll still be great :D and THE BLACKOUT, OH MY GOD. I'M STUPIDLY EXCITED FOR THAT :D :D :D :D :D :D

Oh, and this Year 7 boy is now officially a pimp. Like, seriously. Me and my friends sat down with him today in the canteen because there weren't any seats and he was alone, then we saw his friends out of the window and they were teasing him about it. Then my friend Abbie goes, "if they try to wind you up about it, just tell them that you get all the chicks. You got 4 Year 10 girls, when was the last time they spoke to a Year 10 girl?" and oh god, he looked genuinely scared.

But the best thing was that afterwards, he was like "You know those boys on the tennis courts? I play football with them" and I was GONE. Oh my god, I had tears pouring down my cheeks and I just couldn't breathe. It was just so ridiculous! WHY was he telling us this? No one mentioned football, no one cared, but Abbie just asked some questions to style it out, but it was too late for me. I went to my next lesson crying with laughter, even now just thinking about it, it's making me laugh. Omfg.

So yes...that's what's been happening in the world of Emma recently.