Live shot taken at the Sydney, Australia show, in July, 2011
The loss of Jimmy "The Rev" Sullivan was something of a devastating blow to the Avenged Sevenfold community.
I still remember the night I was informed of his death, clear as if it were just yesterday. I was sitting on my bed watching a DVD after spending the day with family, celebrating my father’s birthday, when my sister-in-law came into my room and asked me if I'd heard that The Rev had died. I remember laughing at her, thinking she was insane and telling her that it wasn't true, before asking her where she got that crazy idea from. She said that a friend of hers had posted on Facebook about it and that's why she'd come to see me, to see if it was true.
Naturally the first thing I did was jump on my laptop and hurriedly opened my internet browser and since my homepage is an Australia music news website, the top story on the site was the headline "Avenged Sevenfold drummer found dead".
My heart felt like it stopped when I read that headline. The shock that overcame me was incredible and I remember being sort of afraid to click on the link that would take me to the full story. It was just so surreal, to be reading about the death of someone so young and full of life... I mean, it was Jimmy; the most entertaining and insane drummer I'd ever come across and this article was telling me that he was dead. I didn't want to believe it.
But of course, it was true.
I remember walking out into the living room and telling my parents (both avid music lovers and who even listened to Avenged Sevenfold on occasion) and even they were shocked. I mean, it wasn't like any one of us believed that the guys lived like saints, but to hear that one of them had died so suddenly, it was just so heartbreaking and dumbfounding.
Returning to my room, the shock seemed to wear off and I sat on the end of my bed where I broke down in sobs. I knew it was kind of weird to be feeling so distraught over the loss of someone I didn't even know, but my emotions were uncontrollable. I remember my brother came in to see if I was okay and found me in my tearful state, then simply gave me a big hug and told me that it was alright to cry. He said that he understood how I felt, because he’d felt the same when Dimebag Darrell (of Pantera) had been murdered. It wasn’t only a loss to those that knew him; but a loss to everyone who was touched by the music he made.
After a while, like everyone else, I began to wonder what would become of the band now that they’d lost one of their members. It sort of felt selfish to worry that they wouldn’t continue—even though I would’ve understood completely, had they chosen not to—but at the same time, I think that as a fan the loss would’ve been even harder if we lost the music, too. Since that was all we had to remember and honor him through, I think if they had have chosen not to continue, I never would’ve felt a sense of closure. Again, I feel weird saying this as I’m simply just a fan (I never had the honor of meeting him personally), but when you love a band like Avenged Sevenfold and become part of the A7X community, the loss of a member feels personal.
I think it was February when I learnt of the news that they were scheduled to perform at the HeavyMTL festival in Montreal, Canada. I remember being excited and relieved that they were continuing on for the moment and wishing there was some way I could be there for that show, to show my support for them. After all, it was going to be the first show since the death of Jimmy and we all knew it would be one of the hardest things they’d have to do, so to be there and cheer them on was something that would’ve been a once in a lifetime experience.
I told my good friend, Iza (The_Used) about the show and she was very excited, as she lives in Quebec City, just a few hours away from Montreal and had every intention of attending. I told her of my desire to go and jokingly said that I should go so I could finally meet her and attend the festival with her. She thought this was a great idea, however, and encouraged me to really think about doing it.
To say the idea of me leaving my home on the Central Coast, NSW, Australia and traveling all the way to Montreal, Canada was crazy is understatement. I was twenty three, working casually in a supermarket and I’d never traveled any further than interstate on my own. I was quite dependent on my family, barely even wanting to go down to the local grocery store on my own, let alone to a whole other country to meet people I’d only ever chatted to over the internet.
But I started to think that maybe this was my last chance to ever see the band live again, since there was no guarantee they’d ever return to Australia, even if they were to do a major tour. After all, it wouldn’t be the first time a band overlooked Australia when booking international tours (Rancid hasn’t been here since 1996 which is just appalling! But that’s a whole other story…) generally because our country is so spaced out, that it is quite expensive for a band to tour here. We don’t have tour buses (since it can take up to 24 hours to travel from one city to another); bands have to fly from city to city, which makes it harder and more expensive than most other countries.
It was for this reason, I eventually came to the conclusion that I was going to do it; I was going to travel to Canada in July to meet my friends and see Avenged Sevenfold perform their first show since Jimmy’s passing. With only four months’ notice, I had to work my ass off to save money for the flights (which cost just under $2000) and spending money, not to mention still have money left over to live as well.
But even though it was a tough four months, the reward was beyond worth every minute of it. The feeling of independence and freedom I got when I boarded the plane (after assuring my tearful and fearful parents that I would come home safely) was amazing. I wasn’t nearly as nervous as I probably should’ve been—I was actually that relaxed that I fell asleep in my seat before the plane even took off!
The flight was a long one, twenty hours, but it was worth every second when I finally made it to Montreal and got to meet my longtime friend, Iza. It was awesome to finally hang out and chat face to face with someone I’d spent many hours on conversing on MSN with, especially since it felt like we’d already known each other for years, so there was no awkwardness whatsoever. Within a few days another good friend, Kris (x.Kris.x) joined us from Toronto, Canada and before we knew it, the weekend of the festival rolled around and it was time to see Avenged Sevenfold, minus one member.
We were all nervous on the day, not knowing what to expect when the band came on stage or what to expect of our own reactions when we saw someone else behind the drums. I had even had t-shirts made up for us which we all wore—on the front was a picture of the deathbat with the words “It’s Your Fucking Nightmare” and written on the back was the date and place “July, 2010, Montreal, Canada”—so we’d always have something remember the day by.
That’s me after their set, looking a little worse for wear
Kris, Iza and I decided we’d try to make our way through some of the crowd and we made it about halfway in, before it became impossible to move any further. Iza (being very petite) only lasted one song before she decided to bail out of the pit, while Kris and I held on for a couple more, before breathing became an issue and we too bailed out.
The boys during their second or third song of the set
The show itself was flawless, they sounded amazing and I couldn’t find one fault in the music (even though majority of the songs were new to me, since the album hadn’t been released yet) which made me admire them even more. There were jumbo screens which came in handy once we left the pit and I even filmed some of the performance on my phone, capturing quite a few songs with half decent quality considering the outdoor setting. Pictures weren’t that great; however, as we were too far away for our camera’s to capture anything decent.
The atmosphere around us was amazing. The support and admiration was rolling off the crowd in waves and even though you could tell the experience was very difficult for the band, they really did put everything into the show. It wasn’t until the backdrop changed to the image of The Rev hugging Syn and Johnny that it seemed like the entire crowd deflated all at once.
Kris and I stood there, tears rolling down our faces as we watched them perform So Far away, our hearts aching for the four men up on the stage. The emotion that showed through on their faces, even from the distance, was so gut-wrenching that we couldn’t help but become completely emotional.
I don’t think I’ll ever forget the forlorn expression on Syn’s face throughout that entire song. He looked so raw and broken that all I wanted to do was give the poor guy a hug. It was so heartbreaking.
But even with all the emotion and pain they seemed to be going through, they still managed to pull off an amazing show; one I’ll never forget.
It was the highlight of my two week holiday in Canada, but the entire experience was something I’m glad I accomplished. I got to meet two people I never thought I’d get the chance to hang out with; I got to see and experience a whole other country and I got to see my favourite band, I mean who could ask for anything more?
I’ve since seen a7x once more, almost exactly a year to the date in Sydney, Australia last year with my best friend, Bek—whom I got hooked on the band and popped her concert cherry by dragging her along—and another friend, Sas (kiss my sass)bringing my total to 3 times (which in my opinion is not nearly enough!) and that show was also fantastic. I was in the mosh pit this time and smack bang in front of Vengeance, which was a great place to be, in my opinion.
After reading all this, you’re probably wondering why I felt the need to randomly post a blog detailing my experience… well, honestly, I realised the other day that I had never taken the time to write it down. It was a major event in my life, something I’ll always be proud I did and I wanted to share it with people who would understand.
It was something I'll never forget and I'll always remember it as my way of paying tribute to an amazing drummer that will always be idolized by the fans. I’m so glad the band decided to continue on, but I’m also glad that I took the chance and made the trip to be there for what could’ve potentially been their first and last appearance without Jimmy.
Thankfully, it wasn’t the last show and I hope to see them many more times in the years to come. I’m sure Arin is doing Jimmy proud and will be a valued member of the a7x crew for life, after all, he’s keeping Jimmy’s beats alive whilst bringing is own sound to new music and that’s all we can ask for. The revolution that is Avenged Sevenfold is far from over and I can’t wait to see what they’ve got in store for us next!
