Let's Go Back to August '09

Have you ever met someone, and you just become the best of friend like the snap of a finger? Well, I have. Way back in my eighth grade year, I came back to a school that I hadn't stepped foot in in years, and I had no intentions of liking anyone. But one girl broke through. She's been with me, through thick and thin, all the way through high school. Until now.

It started slowly, she stopped eating with us except for every few days every now and then. The texts stopped coming soon after. Then she was gone. The only time I knew when anything was going on in her life is if I caught it walking through the halls or talking to someone she was in contact with a lot, and I'd assumed that she would text me later that night and fill me in. She never did.

I started going through my own problems, and when I turned to talk to her, she wasn't there. I was left alone. I figured she'd come back to me, but she never did. Then, out of the blue, two months later, she's there. Asking me about my love life, of all things. And I couldn't take it anymore. I told her, "Well, maybe if you were around more often, you'd know." She replied, "I know, and I'm sorry. I've just had so much going on with Allstate. I'll try harder." I didn't want to hear any of it.

When I moved to a different school after first term of our Freshman year I promised her I'd never let it change our friends ship, and for the most part it didn't. Now I'm back, and she promised she wouldn't let anything get in between us now that I was, I guess that was a hard promise to keep.

The thing that hurts the most for me, is the fact that she's not even trying. Friendships shouldn't be full of bull shit, lies, drama, and getting back at each other. I just want the girl I used to play Chubby Bunny with, I want the girl that spit beer everywhere in ninth grade after we played Chubby Bunny. I want the girl that would walk all over town with me, and complain the whole way. I want the girl that I used to spend the night with almost every weekend back. I want the girl that I share a Yin and Yang necklace with back. I want my best friend back. I want to stop avoiding her in the halls, I want to stop worrying that she's going to come outside and sit in the commons the same day that I do, I want to stop worrying that she's forgotten me.

I wish I could go back, to eighth grade, and make you promise to never let Junior year come between us. I want you to promise that you'll never let me go. That you'll never forget me. But I can't do that. Maybe this is God's work, or maybe it's just us, either way, I know that this isn't you. This isn't me. I want you back.

They say to make your blogs meaningful, if this isn't, then I don't know what is.
November 6th, 2012 at 01:46am