Same

I don't know what the fuck this is. A 4am blog? The most emotional point of my night? Who knows.
My genuine feelings right now:
1. Why won't Mike Lewis love me? I'm everything he needs. I have a vagina. He has a penis. The perfect fit. I'm not too keen on his stubble but we can get past that. We can fuck in the dark.
2. Why do I try so hard with everything I do socialwise, when in reality, however many true friends or not I have will get me nowhere, it will just help me cover up the fact that I don't know who the FUCK I am and never will?
3. Why is it that I claim to have passions for music, for art, for animals, for writing - yet when it comes down to it, I simply don't CARE enough about ANYTHING, not even THESE things, to amount to them?
4. Why if I'm so talented do I keep feeling like I'm going to trip up somewhere down the line, realise I've taken the wrong path, let everyone down again?
5. What the FUCK is iced tea? how the fuck does THAT work?
6. If Ian really does have H.I.V, what am I going to do when he dies? I'll break down. I'll stop TWEETING for fucks sake. Nothing will make me stop tweeting. Except ian dying of h.i.v. I have so much respect for him already, and if he does, I have even more, what a fucking strong, brave man. His problem is that he's scared of getting old. It's heartbreaking to watch him try to stay young. I want to hug him and tell him he's perfect the way he is. (p.s. google him having hiv if you don't believe me and decide for yourself. :c so sad)
7. When I go back to wales in a few weeks, will my sexy cousin still be there? If so, do you think he'll like me back?
8. Why aren't I pretty. If I was pretty I'd get things handed to me on a plate. And I'd be dating Sean smith. and fucking Ian watkins.
9. WHY THE FUCK DID I GO OUT WITH THAT GUY LOL.
10. If I changed my name to Shaniqua would people start losing respect for me?
11. Does anyone have any respect for me in the first place?
12. I'm definitely changing my name to Shaniqua.
13. I wonder how Tim's doing, rachael's friend. Hope I didn't upset him.
14. I wonder where the whole Santa Claus rumour started. Someone must have been very bored.
15. How many hours will it take for Stu to unfollow me.
16. Why am I a virgin I don't want to be someone have sex with me please
17. YAY THE NUMBER OF THOUGHTS MATCHES MY AGE