Excuse my rant.

I'm just so done with this, all of this. I'm so ready to just go to bed and sleep for about three years. I thought I was getting better, I thought everything was going to be okay. Nope, apparently not. It's been four years of this, I'm so done.

I wish I could stop pushing people away, or maybe just find somebody that won't let me. I lost all my friends when I dropped out of school, I feel like I'm all by myself. I also feel like a failure for dropping out. I should have been stronger, I guess... People have made fun of me my whole life, what made it so significant that I had to drop out of school this time? I don't get it. I don't get when things started going so wrong.

I haven't even bothered covering the cuts/scars on my arms around my Mom, I'm just so done trying to impress everyone. I never put on make up, or nice clothes, or even feel pretty anymore. I'm so, so done with this. Everything.

I just feel like I've exhausted all the options, I feel like this is as good and bad as it gets... and I'm just so, so

tired.