I have a problem with spending money/looking up?

I haven't admitted this out loud to anyone in real life because it's pretty bad.

I'm so incredibly depressed and I'm, like, medicating with money. What makes me feel better (and then worse) is going and buying something I really can't afford. It's usually not a ton, just $20 on DVDs or a $5 Starbucks drink, but I can't afford it. And it adds up quickly.

I'm one month behind on both electric and internet and $45 behind on rent. I get paid on the third and I can pay the $45, part of the rent that will be due, and both or one of the bills.

Thankfully this should all be getting better in January. My recruiter at the temp agency I'm registered with said I probably wouldn't get a new job until January (last three weeks of the year is a bitch for hiring, of course), but that I should get a full time data entry job very quickly.

After I get hired, I'll get paid weekly. I'll also be eligible for health, dental, and vision insurance one week of my first paycheck. It's less than $25 a week. I will be able to go to a doctor and get medication for my Bipolar. So that will help with my depression. (Making enough money to actually live and not survive will help, too.)

I'll also be able to get new glasses/lenses for the first time in 5-6 years.

Things should get better soon.