Rambling.

Honestly I'm not too sure what to write about. I'm just in that mood where all I'd like to do is write and listen to music while sipping on tea. Unfortunately I'm out of my favorite tea, so this will have to do. A lot has happened in my life recently. I moved across the country, I've met new people, and I'm learning to be a real human being. It's a little overwhelming, but in an astoundingly comfortable way. Does that make any sense? Regardless, that is the case. The area is beautiful, and the love of my life is with me. Honestly I feel safe here with him. Away from every morbid thought and feeling that Mississippi gave me. I went from wanting to kill myself to loving life, and it scared me. I'm like a mouse with how twitchy and nervous I am. I don't know how to act when not filled with anger and horrible thoughts. I want to grow into who I am supposed to be, and I feel like being here will be the reason I do. I can be such a talented and intelligent young woman, I just need to stop holding my mind back. Which is, sadly enough, what I've been doing most of my life. I don't know how to change that, but God knows I want to. I would give everything to be able to relax, and just free my mind. I shouldn't be so uptight and awkward at my age. I have a lot of maturing to do, and I sincerely hope it hits me soon, or I feel I may lose it. No. Not my sanity.