How to see yourself as beautiful

This was a facebook status of mine a long time ago.

I want to talk about something serious, so if you're looking for laughs or heartwarming fluff skip over this thank you very much.
.
.
.
Still here? Great; I'm not sure how to put this eloquently so I'll just come out and say it. I don't feel pretty. NOOO don't you dare go to those comments and put something like 'aww, you are pretty, Goldy.' NO NO NO! I'm not fishing for compliments here, and even if you didn't think I was pretty you'd still post something along those lines (or at least, I hope you would). I want to talk about this stupid teenage obsession with beauty. If you're not interested still, I suggest you leave, because I'm actually talking about serious stuff here-and most of you would rather the jokes and heartwarming stuff I'm sure is above and below me in your newsfeed right now.

Still here? I congratulate you. This means you're either seriously bored, I'm a very interesting writer or you're mature enough to give this a good read through. Anyway, let me get to the actual story/opinion part of this status. Today, as I was washing off the makeup in my bathroom tonight from the day, I did what many, many, many teenage females do; I thought about what I don't like about myself. I don’t like how my eyelids get completely covered when I open my eyes so my eye shadow smudges and blends together. I don’t like how one eye has two wrinkles under them when the other only has one. I don’t like how my smile always favours one side of me so I look like I’m winking poorly. I don’t like how my hair dances at this length that is too short to keep full on my back but long enough that I can’t always leave it down as it is without getting Hermione-head. I don’t like how broad my shoulders are so it makes the rest of my body look disproportionate. And, I don’t like my weight. Who does?

What is this fascination with weight anyway? The idea that I am a dozen or so more pounds than you seems to suddenly make you better than me somehow; like I’m not worthy to take up any space just because I use a little more than you. It’s sickening. I’m tired of feeling unworthy of the same treatment as every other girl my age, and feeling like no one aside from my friends and family care about me. Should I expect them to? I don’t know. There is so much I don’t know. All I do know is when I walk down the halls, or into a new classroom, or even into a store I feel like people automatically think less of me than if I were less of me (literally). I don’t know what you’re actually thinking, but I can’t expect myself to. I can’t expect you to know how I feel either. Whether it’s something you do, or an atmosphere or the general expectancy that people who don’t feel small and pretty are judged; even if they’re not.

To move away from weight anyway, I looked into the mirror today and realized what I was doing; I realized how often I do it without even thinking about it. So I decided to look instead, at the features I liked. I like the way my eyes are a light blue that shine with youth and optimism I know I have inside me. I like the way my nose feels the perfect size to my face and eyes. I like the shape of my jaw and how it cups my face. I like the colour of my hair my mother spent so long working on. I like the way my teeth are in a good shape, without needing braces or anything. I like the position of my ears. I realized that I like so many more things about me than I dislike. And for once in my life, I felt pretty without feeling fake. Without having to smudge makeup over my pores (however little I do try and use).

I’m posting this because I know there are so many people like me, so many people that have felt so belittled because of how society sees them, or how they expect society to see them, that they overlook these beautiful details. Once you disregard the weak points, you find a treasure trove of beauty you just couldn’t see. We look at ourselves through these magnifying glasses, hiding the nice things and exaggerating the bad in our minds until we forget that beauty is even there. You don’t have to search for or create beauty, because it’s there. You just have to remove the obstacles hiding from you.