Finish Line.

i dont know if I can do this anymore. I was so scared that I couldnt find all the answers in you and you proved me right. Oh baby I will love you till the end of time. I remember that one day in your car when you promised me that you wouldnt hurt me. The way you looked into my eyes almost made me forget that people lie. Almost. I just cant anymore. I'm tired of the problems and complications. I'm tired of trying to figure out your mood all the time. I loved it when you were happy and I hated the days you didnt talk to me. I hated the days that we fought the most which seems to be everyday now. My attitude towards you has changed very drastically and I dont know exactly how to handle it. I miss you. I hate you. I love you. I can't be around you. I want to be around you. Its a hundred different things and...I need some time alone. Lots of time and never returning. I have to go. I used to think that somehow we had a chance since everything, every fight was always fixed somehow but I find them pushed under a rug still broken. I don't want to pick up the pieces and I dont want you. The only thing I want to do is give up and thats exactly what I intend to do and its going to be done. You are nothing but broken pieces of glass stuck in my hands and your words are like the salt in my wounds. You're no good for me. Did you fall in love with me? I fell...or maybe I fell for the idea of you. I am alone and I am proud. Goodbye this time baby. Not all the diamonds, happiness, smiles or love could fix us. What we were died a long time ago. I just hope that I can find all the answers in the other half of my red string hopefully my red string comes along soon. I wanna see the heaven in his eyes, I wanna feel him need me. I am trapped in my own mind, hopefully I stay there this time. Keep me safe with this fake ass smile please take me to the finish line and then please take me away. I can't stay anymore. Whatever was against us wins I dont care anymore just like you. And thats how you sing it. You are wrong so please stop haunting me. I dont want these filthy memories anymore because they mean nothing. I dont want to remember being with you. I dont want to remember being in love with you. I dont want to remember meeting you. I dont want to remember the things you said to me. I dont want to remember the way your lips felt on mine for the first time. I only want to remember the way that this feels, how it feels to finally be at the finish line, how it feels to actuallly be hurt, how the way giving up feels. It feels sweet, bitter, sad and exausting. I'm exausted. I'm letting this go right now, right at this moment. This is the last of my feelings. Your prediction was right, you said that the next time would be the last time and forever.