Finally.

Though a quick entry, I feel this is something I need to address, for my own guilt more than anything. I’ve been a member on here for years now and a lot of my free time revolves around writing stories for you people to read. Another aspect of the site, of course, is the evident social featurettes that make up the majority of the community feel.

Now, because I only really come on here to post my updates and see over my subscriptions, I failed to see until the last few months that the inbox feature was at all prominent and to be honest, I wasn’t really sure that it was there at all.

Because I’m an ignorant, stupid, overly trusting person, I’d allowed a friend of mine to use the feature, as for an off reason he felt that it was necessary. So when I log in to my emails one day, to find distressing messages from several people relating to him, to say I was shocked was a complete understatement. He was talking to so many people, all with different stories, different tragedies. I can’t even begin to fathom how he could accomplish such a thing, considering the longest conversation he had spanned over nearly two years.

From what I could tell, he simply obsessively checked the account, deleting emails when it suited. Hearing it, I felt he had gone completely mad. He called me up in a fit of (most likely drug induced) bull shit and went on and on about how he’d “messed up”. I couldn’t help but feel he’d over reacted but when I read back the stuff he’d told these people. My God. The emotional rides he appeared to have taken them all on was completely staggering to me.

I felt I never wanted to speak to him again. Not because of what he had done to me, but because of what he appeared to be doing to these others, these members who I myself had subscribed to. One boy he appeared to have completely broken down through a petty pretend relationship, and another woman, he had spun her along, lying to keep what seemed to be a friendship. I write this because, well, I feel damn awful.

I don’t know, nor do I care how he feels about it, he’s done this constantly in his life so I don’t feel it’s my place to wonder any more. I don’t know the extent of what he did or how much of it he deleted, but I wanted to say this to all those who he deceived.

I imagine it wasn’t his aim to fuck you all over for what it is worth, but I am sorry for the trouble he put you through. Don’t feel hurt by him, he’s nobody.

One member I would really like to apologise for, I will link this to you, because I feel as though the damage was worse here. He took parts of my life, my photographs, my friends and moulded them into an incoherent mess. He’d take notes from my upcoming chapters and claim to have written them. I don’t know why you had such a sway over him, he told me he lied to impress you, because of love or some other bull shit idea.

I feel as though all the control I had over this account was lost and I have really considering closing the whole damn thing, I am so ashamed of what this whole Mibba business has become for me. It saddens me to an extent I cannot describe. This is something I full heartedly enjoy doing and it’s been messed up by the stupid life of a messy boy. Again, I am sorry.

My name is Victor (Tori) Smedley, I am an artist, currently a student. I live in fucking Lincoln. Nice to meet you.