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On a not so positive note, I mentioned in my last blog that I got kicked out of my house today. And you'll have to forgive me, Mibba, but I need to vent a little here.
So, it's a well known fact among people who know me that my mom and I generally don't get along. I try, I really do. But she's one of those people who's always right, all the time, even when she's wrong.
And, usually, I do get along with my father. But, lately, he's become one of those "no respect for you because I'm old" types, and it really has been bothering me.
Now, I was brought up my whole life to listen to and respect my parents and I feel that I tried, to the best of my abilities and patience, to make them happy with me and to follow their rules while living under their roof.
But sometimes, Mibba, enough is enough.
For those of you who don't know me, I am the eldest of four siblings, I'm twenty-one, employed at a crappy drug store where I bust my buttox to make the pittance I do make six days a week, I'm paying back student loans because, somehow, even with my pay being complete and utter crap, I still don't qualify for financial aid somehow.
I'm supposed to be saving for my own car. I pay my own phone bill. I pay for expenses for my two cats. I pay my parents two hundred bucks a month to live in one bedroom in the house my family lives in.
I buy all my own food because my family eats really unhealthily and I, at one time, weighed 250-some-pounds and I work really hard not to weigh that much again.
And yet it isn't enough, Mibba.
Nothing I do is enough.
My parents always want more from me. And I just...
It wouldn't be so bad if it were just me, either.
My younger brother in the middle has problems with memory and is a little bit slower at getting things than the rest of us. But all you have to do is take a little extra time with him, and he gets it. But they make him feel awful or taking his time and being a perfectionist with things because they're always in some damn hurry to do nothing.
And then, my mother slammed her head against the table and made my youngest brother feel like complete crap because he wasn't understanding the way she was explaining his homework to him.
My dad has been a taskmaster to everyone for the past month and a half.
And me, I just snapped. I went off on my parents and told them everything that they're doing is wrong, because it is, and I told them that, if they want a family, they have to act like it and stop treating us like shit. (Except for the brother right under me, who gets treated like "The Little Prince".
And then they told me that if I didn't like it, I needed to leave.
And I've already been staying at my great aunt's, helping her get around after her hip surgery. (She needs another one now, too.) So I'm holed up here and I can't even think about going and getting the rest of my stuff. Because Jon had to go in and get what stuff I have here, because they won't scream at him.
UHGHGHGHG.
Well.
I'll stop bothering you all with my crappy life now.
______
Anyway.
To end on a postiive note:
Hina and I have a kickass new co-writer!
