The Last Day of School

Heavy aura of *almost* guilt.
No feeling of significance.
Even though I've been sweating bullets for the past year about starting the beginning of my life. The last fucking day of school and I'm walking around as if I'll "See Y'all Next Year!"
Which is false. Completely and Utterly.
I'll be shipped off to bootcamp then.
At least I'm praying (not really) so...

My urgency to get "the hell outta Dodge," would have you write me off as; a typical teenage graduate, escaping to a new far off adventurous place.
Which isn't entirely false.
But not so much as escaping - more like graduating to be an actual-fucking-adult.
Relying on my parents is truly NOT all that appetizing to me.
Ironically they REALLY want me to stay.

...

I digress.

I can't help but feel (again:) *almost* guilty for not giving a flying fuck whether I see these pricks again.
Sad. I know.
That smile though, when I open my yearbook and see the handful of signatures and "thoughtful notes" (as my study hall teacher decided to call them).
I really haven't asked people so it's almost blank.
Which (I can't imagine but) might actually make me feel sorta shitty when I turn back the pages of my Senior year and Remember my carelessness of the dumbfucks I gave less the a quarter of a shit about because I discovered they weren't really worth my time.
Don't get me wrong I go to a school with a CRAP TON of talented individuals.

But ...

Are they worth shit to me? Maybe... like a handful.
Maybe.

Sad, But true. So can you see the significance in this day through my eyes...?
Almost none.. right?

Hopefully it'll rise as I wear that cap & gown, and recieve the diploma.
Because then It wont be about them or for them or with them.
Then, it'll be about me. It'll be about my independence.
It'll be about my promised solitude.