I Want Mary Sues

Yeah you heard that right, I want Mary Sues. I’m writing an arc for Judgement day that satirizes Mary Sues, the basis of the arc is the four Judges go to Ireland, which has less restrictions on the Judges social polices. Anyway I need your old Mary Sues so I can help fuel my story with some characters because I can only think of so many of them. If you want to know what I mean here is a excerpt from the first chapter of the arc.

Deep within the Emerald Isles of Ireland some strange phenomenon started to occur. The barriers between this world and other worlds started to bridge together and rip open. Sucked into the void and transported to this world they left worlds that they had untied through their love and “sacrifice” and were brought to this world. What they would was not entirely certain.

Alice Raven Hunter Aqua Sinister was the first one of these people to be transported into our world. Her hair was raven black with purple and blue highlights that matched her black nail polish. Both of which complimented her awesome pale, marble skin that looked just like one of the vampires out of Twilight. .Especially since she had a boyfriend named Edward who was one-fourth vampire, one-fourth werewolf, one-fourth walrus to account for his rather large penis, and one-fourth magical sprinkles of awesome sauce. He was about to propose to her with the Hope Diamond while riding her pet Loch Ness Monster, it preferred Nessie, when she was sucked into this crap of sack world.

On her back was her soul craving scythe/key blade of utter darkness and light. It could rip an evil soul out and then infuse them with pure evil or pure good to make them lovable and amazing like a small puppy, because you were still awesome if you were one or the other in her world. She had gotten it from a wise old man who was supposed to have given it to a different person but realized she was so megarrific that he had to pass along a weapon that he had guarded for ten thousand years to her after she batted her eyelashes.

“What in holy Aphrodite?” she exclaimed to her goddess, a religion that she had single handily brought back from the dead. “Where are Edward and Nessie? Why does everything smell like half day old baked Alaska? The one thing I find totally most unfantabulous and would cause a complete and utter apocalypse if it went unchecked!”

“Calm urself. All the Basked Alaska in da world wil DIAF when we take zis world ovur.” a voice that Alice recognized immediately even though she had never heard it before except for hearing it five seconds ago.

Alice ran over to a shadow emerging out of a dark alley. She bowed before her and placed her hand over her heart like she knew the pledge always went that she had figured out two seconds ago. “Hail to the queen of queens, Evony Darkening Insanity Crow Pathfinder. May your awesomeness always be kawaii and your sex always be amazing.”

“Tankz my child. E now awit ur brothers and sizserz. Then we will make this whole world kawaii.” Evony told her while patting Raven’s cheek and smiled to reveal white teeth with pentagrams branded into them, which went with her MCR shirt and torn I Love Satan leggings.

“It will be megariffic.” Raven replied as she stood up and kissed Evony, turning bisexual for the first time ever but totally justifiable, as Evony was really damn hot okay?

So please help a guy out here? IT’s a chance to get rid of those old Mary Sues that are haunting you from years past.
June 19th, 2013 at 03:55am